dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
