Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
