I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
