Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
