and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
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