tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
