i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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