the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
