In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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