i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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