Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize