susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
