But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
