is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize
