i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
