ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
