So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
