Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
You can't just leave with hair like that
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Randomize
