Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
