Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
