I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
