New invention idea: vibrating tampons
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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