On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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