Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
