last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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