I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Randomize
