Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
