She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
