Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
