Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Boobs are out for the taking
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
