I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize