I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Randomize
