He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
How's work?
Spinning.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
