My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
being pregnant is like rehab
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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