I love black thongs
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
