My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
