We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
