Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
