So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
