the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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