Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Randomize
