He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
