My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Randomize