i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
It's blow job season.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
