____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
