just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
