i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
There's always time for handjobs
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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