lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
