My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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