I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize
